It's the controlling for me

 Came home from family group. 

C was in the kitchen, frying plantains. 

I said hello. 

He told me we have chicken thighs. I said OK. 

He told me he was only going to use soy sauce and ginger to cook them. It would be an experiment. 

The air frier is new as of yesterday. 

He kept commenting about how cheap the thighs were. All of this for $6. 

I said OK. 

He then asked me if I wanted to cook the chicken. 

I instictively sick of his shit said "I don't want to cook here where you're going to tell me 20 things I did wrong." 

And I said I need to decompress from the day. 

I needed go upstairs. 

I didn't ask him to cook. I said I didn't want to. 

I went upstairs to close the door. 

And listen to music and crochet alone. 

He screams upstairs that I locked the cat out. 

I let her in. 

20 min go by and he comes upstairs, opens the door and tells me that he does not want the chicken, and that if I'm not going to eat it he's going to throw it out. 

Who does that? 

He just bought it today. 

Raw chicken thighs. 

I said I may not cook it today but I will cook it tomorrow. I know he goes to aftercare group tomorrow and I will have the kitchen to himself so he can't point out my 100 mistakes while cooking the chicken. 

He doesn't like that answer, but goes downstairs. 

I know he wanted me to come downstairs so he could rant at me about his day. 

He doesn't care about what I have to say about anything anymore. I don't live in an equal partnership and I don't feel heard. 

I spoke my truth by saying "I don't want to cook the chicken now so you can point out what I'm doing wrong." 

Fuck me though if this isn't what it's like being in the aftermath of an alcoholic relationship. 

If I do go down and cook the chicken now that he isn't there he's just going to complain that I didn't clean properly. 

I'm so done. Soo SOO done. 

I'm so done being controlled.