Thursday, July 22, 2010

Story Starter Thursday

I'm putting this out there. Laugh if you wish. I'm starting a story starter day one day a week on here. This is something on my computer that I discovered just tonight. I wrote it three years ago. It's awful, don't judge, but I thought someone would have some fun with it. Feel free to continue the story on your own blog, or include it in your writing somewhere.

The adventurous Miss Caroline--ahem that’s Princess Caroline to you—and the awful case of the “I can get anything I want because I’m so cute” disease

There once was a little girl named Caroline Elizabeth Riana Schutzelbutz.

Her mommy called her care bear, her nanny called her C, her father, (whom she saw once a month on a good month), called her boo precisely because he couldn’t remember her name, and the kid that came over from the neighboring palace once a week for a play date called her Princess, at her request.

To put it lightly, Princess Caroline was a little hard to deal with. But who could blame her?

Somewhere early in her childhood someone had told Princess Caroline that because she was so cute, she could have anything she wanted. Without lifting a finger. It didn’t matter that her mother was exhausted. It didn’t matter that the pre-school teacher took every opportunity to remind her mother that she was raising a spoiled rotten brat.

Not enough Pepperidge Farm Goldfish on her plate at snack time? No big deal. Miss Caroline Elizabeth would merely put on her sunglasses, sprinkled with no less than 14-karat-gold glitter, and gingerly march on over to one of the teacher’s assistants. Can I please have some more goldfish? Why sure, the adult would say, and pour more goldfish.

Boys hogging the swing at play time outside? Simple. March over to the swing, slather up the best cute face and saliva in her mouth, smile, and plant the biggest, fattest, wettest kiss on the biggest kid in the class, Herman Hooverbinger. That sure got him to move fast out of the way!

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