Monday, July 30, 2012

A reminder

I really haven't been saving as much as I should be living at home and all. My piggy bank is not as full as it should be. It should be burping, LOL. Did I really need that dress at Target, not really, but it did make me happy. But will it make me happy in 5 years? Probably not...I don't really know where I am going here, but I guess we can all do a little better with saving and not spending, finding cheaper entertainment and budgeting needs vs. wants. My goal for August. Month by month, day by day. Ha! We'll see how it goes...

Sunday, July 29, 2012

I haven't been living up to my title lately

I haven't rambled in quite a while. I haven't gone anywhere. In between the grad school quest and the career quest I forgot to explore. And I hate it. It's making me antsy and I want to go somewhere soon. Tell me where I should go!

Absolutely.

Sunday, July 22, 2012

Scariest damn morning

So I had a pretty scary morning at work. To make a long story short, I got locked in the bathroom. It was 5am. Who thinks to take a cell phone to the bathroom? But the door knob just didn't want to open from the inside, so I had to knock on the resident's room who shares a wall with that bathroom, wake her up, and ask her to open the door from the inside. Fortunately, it opened. But what would have gone down had it not opened? I had a not small panic attack thinking about what would have happened had the door been stuck. My residents don't know how to use the phone, so I don't know how I would have called for help. One more reason why we need a second staff here. Ugh. Rough morning. Definitely writing this up.

I really like this secret from PS this week, so true!

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Hey, here are some more for ya!

Makes an Occupied Bed (Client Does Not Need Assistance to Turn) 1. Explain procedure 2. Provide privacy 3. Lower head of bed 4. Client is covered while linens are changed 5. Loosens top linen from the end of the bed 6. Raises side rail on side of bed to which client will move and client moves toward side of raised rail 7. Loosen bottom used linen on working side and move bottom used linen toward center of bed 8. Place and tuck in clean bottom linen or fitted bottom sheet on working side and tucks under client 9. Client moves back onto clean linen 10. Raise side rail and go to other side of bed 11. Remove used bottom linen 12. Pull and tuck in clean bottom linen, finish with bottom sheet free of wrinkles 13. Client is covered with clean top sheet and bath blanket/used top sheet has been removed 14. Change pillowcase 15. Linen is centered and tucked at foot of bed 16. Avoid contact between clothing and used linen 17. Dispose of used linen into soiled linen container and avoid putting linen on floor 18. Call light is within reach 19. Wash hands Measures and Records Blood Pressure 1. Explain procedure 2. Wipe bell/diaphragm and ear pieces with alcohol 3. Position client’s arm with palm up and upper arm is exposed 4. Feel for brachial artery 5. Place blood pressure cuff snugly on client’s upper arm, with sensor/arrow over brachial arty site 6. Earpieces are in ears and bell is over brachial artery site 7. Inflate cuff between 160-180 mm Hg 8. Deflate cuff slowly and note first sound and last sound 9. Call light is within reach 10. Wash hands 11. Record both systolic and diastolic pressures each within plus or minus 8mm of evaluator’s reading Measures and Records Urinary Output 1. Put on clean gloves 2. Pour contents of bedpan into measuring container without spilling or splashing urine outside of container 3. Measure the amount of urine at eye level with container on flat surface 4. Empty contents of measuring container into toilet 5. Rinse measuring container and pour rinse into toilet 6. Rinse bedpan and pour rinse into toilet 7. Remove and dispose of gloves into waste, wash hands 8. Record contents of container within plus or minus 25 ml/cc of evaluator’s reading Performs Passive Range of Motion For One Knee and One Ankle 1. Explains procedure 2. Provide privacy 3. Instruct client to inform nurse aide if pain is experienced during exercise 4. Support leg at knee and ankle while performing range of motion for knee 5. Bend the knee and ten return leg to client’s normal position (extension/flexion) AT LEAST THREE TIMES unless pain is verbalized 6. Support foot and ankle close to the bed while performing range of motion for ankle 7. Push/pull foot toward head (dorsiflexion) and push/pull foot down, toes point down (plantar flexion) AT LEAST THREE TIMES unless pain is verbalized 8. While supporting the limb, moves joints gently, slowly, and smoothly through the range of motion, discontinuing exercise if client verbalizes pain 9. Call light is within reach 10. Wash hands Performs Passive Range of Motion For One Shoulder 1. Explain procedure 2. Provide privacy 3. Instruct client to inform nurse aide if pain is experienced 4. Support client’s arm at elbow and wrist while performing range of motion for shoulder 5. Raise client’s straightened arm from side position upward toward head to ear level and return arm down to side of body AT LEAST THREE TIMES unless pain is verbalized 6. Move client’s straightened arm away from the side of the body to shoulder level and returns to side of body AT LEAST THREE TIMES unless pain is verbalized 7. While supporting the limb, moves joint gently, slowly, and smoothly through the range of motion, discontinuing exercise if client verbalizes pain 8. Call light is within reach 9. Wash hands Positions on Side 1. Explain procedure 2. Provide privacy 3. Lower head of bed 4. Raise side rail on side to which body is to be turned 5. Slowly roll onto side as one unit toward raised side rail 6. Place or adjust pillow under head for support 7. Client is positioned so that client is not lying on arm 8. Support top arm with supportive device 9. Place supportive device between legs with top knee flexed; knee and ankle supported 10. Call light is within reach 11. Wash hands

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Nursing Assistant Update

So I've been taking this class, and I have 25 skills to memorize and perform for the test at the end of the month to get my nursing assistant license. I thought I would share a few with you to see if you would like to participate. Pretty boring, general care-procedures, but this is what my life has been for the month of July. Enjoy! Here are the first four: Washes Hands 1. Address client by name 2. Introduce self by name and title 3. Turn water on at sink 4. Apply soap to hands 5. Lather all surfaces of wrists, hands, and fingers. Produce friction for 15 seconds. 6. Clean fingernails by rubbing fingertips against palms of opposite hand. 7. Rinse all surfaces of wrists, hands, and fingers keeping hands lower than the elbows and the fingertips down. 8. Use clean, dry paper towel to dry all surfaces of hands, wrists, and fingers then dispose of paper towel into waste container. 9. Use clean, dry paper towel to turn off faucet then dispose of paper towel into waste container or use knee/foot control to turn off faucet. 10. Do not touch inside of sink at anytime. Applies One Knee-High Elastic Stocking 1. Explain procedure 2. Provide privacy 3. Client is in supine position 4. Turn stocking inside out 5. Place foot of stocking over toes, foot and heel 6. Pull top of stocking over foot, heel and leg 7. Move foot and leg gently and naturally 8. Finish procedure with NO TWISTS OR WRINKLES 9. Call light is within reach 10. Wash hands Assists to Ambulate Using Transfer Belt 1. Explain procedure 2. Ensure client is wearing shoes 3. Bed is at safe level 4. Check and lock bed wheels 5. Client is sitting with feet flat on the floor 6. Apply transfer belt 7. Pre-arrange signal, stand with feet facing client 8. Alert client to begin standing 9. Hands are in upward position on belt while assisting to stand 10. Walk behind and to the side of client while holding on to belt. Walk for 10 feet 11. Assist client to bed and remove transfer belt 12. Call light is within reach 13. Wash hands Assists with Use of Bedpan 1. Explain procedure 2. Provide privacy 3. Lower head of bed 4. Put on clean gloves 5. Place bed pan directly under buttocks after rolling client to his side and placing cloth under him 6. Remove and dispose of gloves in trash, wash hands 7. Raise head of bed 8. Toilet tissue within reach 9. Hand wipe is within reach, instruct client to clean hands 10. Call light is within reach and ask client to signal when finished 11. Put on clean gloves before removing bedpan 12. Lower head of bed down to flat position 13. Avoid overexposure of client 14. Remove, empty, and rinse bedpan and pour rinse into toilet 15. Place bedpan in designated dirty supply area 16. Remove and dispose of gloves into trash, wash hands 17. Call light is within reach, bed in low position

Monday, July 16, 2012

Sunday, July 15, 2012

This is fun...let's keep looking back!

February 16, 2008 It was a blustery cold afternoon and we gathered at a kind of dive in Northeast Minneapolis. saw just needed to blow off some of the week. The three of us (Dana, Sathiya, and myself) weren’t going to go originally but found ourselves walking in together in a clump. After all, we are AmeriCorps members and we’re clumpers that way. The principal was there and made a crack about my driving before I sat down and I sorta felt self-conscious so when I sat down I made sure to sit as close to Dana as possible. Pretty soon Val walks in and I get temporary moment of panic that calms after she smiles at me. You can tell she feels just as out of place as I do so I feel at ease a little bit. That’s what its like to live with social anxiety. It’s like you live with a bubble around you all the time. With your thoughts surrounding you. “I don’t belong here” “You’re not good enough for these people.” “Go home to where you belong. You don’t deserve this.” Shut up! I scream mentally and then see the other Ms. Peterson walk in. I’m surprised, but again comforted. I didn’t expect to find her here, but she makes me feel at home where ever she finds me, so I am instantly comforted when she sits down immediately across from the three of us. Only until the crew from next door and across the hall sit down on the other side of me. I don’t know what it is about them, but Martha S. and B Kattner have started to make me nervous ever since the great guided reading debate of ’08. Oh man. I also just found out that Danielle got her India trip moved back to September so I may actually get a chance to find a job by then! And move up there! So this is a perfect place to end this journal actually. I’ve made Minneapolis my life for 6 months. Now after six more months of settling in, it will be time to move on to bigger and brighter pastures. New York maybe include din that. Who knows. the world is my oyster and I can do anything. I choose to doe! If teaching is included in that, it is. If it’s not , it’s not, and I’m not going make a huge deal about it. Life is about letting myself have a good time. I’m getting back on my happy pills soon and I will go with the flow. And I’m out of space. Time for a new beginning. That was the end of my first year in Minneapolis and the last journal from AmeriCorps. Turns out I never ended up going to New York, but spent two more years in Minneapolis and flew to Korea to teach for a year there. Life takes ya funny places. I wonder where it will take me next? I wonder where it will take me next?

Positive Sunday

Saturday, July 14, 2012

I'm looking at Dave's ESL cafe tonight thinking, wow, I should do this again!!!!

Look back to...

November 3, 2006 So I decided to start a new journal as a sort of new beginning. I was almost finished with the purple spiral-bound one, but I was getting tired of it. It was too big to carry with me on a daily basis and the edges were getting ratty and I didn't want to have to worry about it falling apart in Gulfport and all of my memories getting destroyed. Does any else find it a little strange that I just rationalized starting a new journal like I feel like I betrayed or cheated on the old one? I surely need help I feel so insanely guilty for ripping out the last 50 pages or so of my old journal because I was so focused on starting a new one. Probably symbolic of the way I feel right now. My past sits on the shelf and I look forward to beginning new. New project. New journal. New me. Right? Now I feel pretty shitty. Kinda reminds me of the weekend during student teaching (about this time of year actually) where I spent 2 hours crying in front of my supervisor and co-op teacher on Friday and all weekend like I was walking in a haze. Afraid to move. Afraid to go forward. Afraid to speak to people. Walking the streets alone. I remember walking down River Road from the dorms to the stadium on a football Saturday. The streets were lined with tailgaters, fans, all having a great time. And I remember noticing them but not noticing them at the same time. Just kept walking, removed from all of it. Because when you're wound that tight you have no where to go but down I suppose. And that's kind of how I feel this week/weekend. I like this journal better too. It's lines are narrower, bot like 5th grade wide rule I've been writing on. My writing seems neater and more controlled and I like it that way. At least for now. I didn't do anything about that weekend, but I am doing something now. For starters, I went to have a chat with the counselor across the hall from James Foreman's office in 202 on Wednesday. God I didn't want to. It's like giving up and admitting there's something wrong. Shit it was hard. But for some reason I ended up talking for an hour and a half that day. And I couldn't tell you half of what I said but for some reason I feel slightly better knowing that 'm taking steps to have this anxiety thing under control. I can't decide if I like her or not. She's awfully young and rather perky, but I can tell she genuinely cares. I trusted her enough Wed. (or was just plain desperate) to accept a referral to her consulting psychiatrist Dr. Crane to discuss medication options. Which I did today and feel absolutely exhausted from but I did it and ended up with a prescription for Zoloft that I should begin taking on Monday if all goes well. Who would have thought? Me of all people on drugs?!?! SSRIs of all things! Sometimes though I guess one has to admit defeat and ask for a little help. And if that help comes in the form of a pill, I suppose that's what it takes sometimes. I want to get to the point where I'm afraid to talk to half of my team. Hell, I don't want to be afraid of a lot of shit. Small shit. Stupid shit. I'm so tired of dealing with it all. All the time. So it's time to start a new phase in my life. It's called the "Let's help Jennifer think positive" phase. Let's help Jennifer form meaningful, lasting relationships she's not afraid or ashamed to hang onto. Let's not let Jennifer feel embarrassed that Maggie of all people had to haul my ass to Dr. Crane's office today. It's her job, I suppose. Bailing Corps members out of jail and dragging them to the shrink. Wonderful. But I guess I am glad that I went and did it.

Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Social anxiety and work

Yes, this is going to be another one of THESE posts. Bear with me because I just have to rant a little bit. I am always amazed at myself when I get so worked up over little things at work. I am such a people-pleaser it isn't even funny. But this is just crazy. I'm 30 years old. This has to stop. Recently, I signed up for a nursing assistant class. This class runs Monday-Friday 5-10pm. But I'm done in a month and I take the state test and I'm licensed to work in a hospital, home health care, group home, long-term care facility, or nursing home setting. Basically, I did it to raise my chances of getting more regular work while in grad school. I have learned that I really like working in health care settings and this is what I ultimately would love to be doing as speech therapist later in life. I'm done with the school setting for good, I think. This is where I need to be going. I need to be working more than every other weekend for the rest of my life, or even for the rest of the year. So I signed up for this class mid-June and gave my notice at work. Trouble is, I had already agreed to fill in for our lead who is taking a vacation for four days mid-July. I had to tell her I couldn't do that. And I had to tell my other weekend co-worker that I couldn't do Fridays. All of this required a simple explanation, but this process was so hard for me to finally do. I don't know why, but it was. I was so worried of what my co-workers would think of me, what they would say about me, and that they would think that I was just a flake. But I know now that all of that is untrue. Not because they told me, but because I know that it's not true. I am simply doing what I have to do to get ahead in my chosen path. If it inconveniences someone, they might be a little angry, but they will get over it. And it's not like I didn't give enough notice either. I gave my manager two whole weeks to find a replacement for the shifts I said I'd take. I guess I'm writing this to say that I really need to stop giving myself undue stress for things I don't need it for. I need to start putting that mental energy elsewhere. All of this time I could have been working on my grad school essays, stuff for my coursework currently, was wasted in time spent obsessing of this current silly little situation. This anxiety thing needs to end and it needs to end now. I had to put my social anxiety group therapy sessions on hold while I do the CNA class this month, but you better believe I'm going back the moment I get a chance in August. On another note, the CNA class is going well. The book work is really easy, factual information like vital signs and procedures to memorize. There are skills that need to be practiced, like using a bed pan and cleaning a catheter, but they will come later. I'm happy with where my life is moving. I would ultimately like to make enough not to live in my parents' home, but that will come later too. I'm looking forward to going to canoeing or tubing this weekend during the hours I'm not working. I'm starting to resent working weekends now because I'm gaining more of a friend base here in Atlanta and it's starting to cut into social time. But I guess it will have to do for now, until I can find a real life nursing assistant job in a hospital during the week and such.

Monday, July 9, 2012

Happy Monday, Folks!

Definitely felt a little like this today!

Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Another Blast from the Past Post

Because that’s what I’m good at lately. Looking back at journals and writing what I wrote before. This one from July 11, 2006. We can learn something from history, if our minds are open enough. This day was my first day of my first AmeriCorps program.
I’m here. Nothing very exciting yet though apparently I’m so tired I can’t even get the right endings on my verbs. My room looks like college part II, though I think these rooms are in slightly worse condition than Creswell Hall’s if that’s at all possible. Ha! My room mate hasn’t actually shown up yet, so for tonight I have the room entirely to myself. Which is nice. I had a nice time unpacking and fixing things while listening to music on my mp3 player. Its sort of like summer camp. I met my team leader, and she seems sweet and smart. A bit on the energetic side, but I guess that’s what one wants in a team leader. My feet HURT from the day. I wore my cheap flats with my skirt, and they absolutely tore my feet apart entirely. So for the first couple of hours I’m here I was kinda glazed over. I’m also trying to remember to take this experience ONE day at a time and not get ahead of myself or too worried about events too far in advance. I introduced myself to my team today as almost OCD organized. And them later in the meeting someone asked for the address and I just shot it out. And some guy on the team said “were giving everything to her to remember from now on” (or something to that effect). Which made me feel good to know that my neurotic tendencies might actually be put to good use and appreciated here. Maybe. Flight here was delayed, so we didn’t actually get here til 6:30ish, giving us enough time to throw luggage in room and grab a PBJ for dinner and get on to meetings. Met several nice folks at the airport, but I haven’t actually seen them since stepping off the van. Tomorrow is a long day of intro stuff, and I’m really tired and would like to read my magazine before drifting off to sleep, so I think I will sign off and revisit feelings tomorrow, whenever. (I’m loving this new journal!) It actually had lines! And while I am aware that I still have some of my sketchbook to finish off, I’ll be doing most of my WRITING longhand in here for obvious reasons. I may be flipping back and forth between the two out of guilt and OCD need to finish one journal before starting another. Is it too soon to tell if I’m the loner yet? I have such loner tendencies, I don’t want them, but I fear I’m going to develop them and fall into the same patterns I’m sued to. Must remember to take life one day at a time. Indeed. Signing off for the night! Goodnight!

Sunday, July 1, 2012

My friend Paige is Awesome

I used to follow her videos all the time in Korea. This is one of my favorites. Make sure you hear the moral of the buying bananas story at the end of this one.