Sunday, October 10, 2010

Dear Friends

I have been really bad about updating this thing with my adventures. I'm in this wonderful country, far far away from my home and yet I have nothing to say most days. Mostly because this has been a work experience. Most of my time has been spent in the throws of teaching at Jesus Miracle English School. Wondering what I've done with my life. Not really teaching anything either. Or maybe teaching SOMETHING, but not really having my heart in it. Mostly because I have no ownership of what I'm teaching. I teach something and my boss lady comes in and tells me to say it a different way or do it differently. She had my Kindergarten kids copying a whole story map and paragraph on Friday, without (I can only guess) really knowing what they were writing. And so it is in Korea. Then she comes up to me at lunch and says "They're getting better. I bet they could hold their own in an American first grade classroom." That, I have no doubt. Having taught first grade for a whole four months, I have no doubt. But at what cost are we getting results? Are these kids going to grow up to hate writing and reading English? I won't spend any more time speculating than I already have, but I just wonder about the futility of our efforts. What does it all stand for?

In the throws of my existential crisis, I have signed up for a few travel experiences with Adventure Korea, a local travel website for expats in Korea. I hope that these experiences will bring me the clarity I need to continue this experience for a year. I know that this experience isn't entirely about work, at least I don't want it to be. I am going on a trip next weekend with them, to see some fall foliage and then another one the following weekend to a temple to explore Buddhism a little more. I've been wanting to leave the city since arriving here and this is a perfect opportunity. I'm almost dreading starting work tomorrow, but I will continue to keep a positive attitude for the week ahead. I can do anything for seven more months! :)

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