Mondays mean nothing to me now

It's bothering me lately that my calendar has so many cross-outs on it. I have written in and penciled out my work schedule so many times, and it's wrong. With people going on vacation and returning and changing their minds, I have just about had it with messing up my schedule. I don't like indecision. Or maybe it's my own confusion. All I know is I need a new calendar. I need to start over. Does any one ever feel like they need a do-over in the great game of life? Does anyone ever feel like rambling? After all what else are blogs for? I know this post makes no sense what so ever, but this is MY little corner of the web and I can do whatever I want with it. In this big wide scary world, that's all the comfort I need right now. OK, off to clean and control the little bit of the world I CAN control. Peace.

Need Some Positive Vibes Sent My Way

I've been way too negative as of late. So I've decided to take the "list one thing that made me happy today" approach to life. Because some days, that's just what one has to do to get through the day.

So here's my one thing: After missing her on g-repeatedly for a two-week span, I finally caught Emily online for forty minutes in between English Festival acts today. It felt great to catch up with a good friend after such a long time...and yes, two weeks without chatting is a long time. It's the little things that get you through this crazy Korea life.

And it's sad, but another thing that made me happy today is the fact that after over a month of repeating the same stories and interviews and drama scripts with kids, I can finally chuck it all in the garb-age and put it all behind me. It might have sucked folks, but ENGLISH FESTIVAL is FINALLY OVER. Maybe now I'll be in a better mood at work. Kids did well, and it's nice to step back and see the whole picture once in a while. I did catch myself thinking at one point, yes, these songs suck, but it's really awesome that kids this age have access to doing all of this in a second language, and felt a little proud to be a part of it.

I guess I have nothing else to say, just that I like to ramble, and I'm going to sign off before I do too much more of it. So much for blogging about things that matter.

Oh, and I did find a home for the rabbit I was fostering for most of my time in Korea. He went to a nice girl who has always wanted to own a rabbit and just moved to Korea. She seemed really eager to take him and I'm relieved I don't have to panic when my contract does end to find a home for him last minute. I loved owning the rabbit, but hated cleaning up after it, and of course, my situation is less than permanent. Maybe one day I'll actually live my dream of owning a few cats. Gosh I'm so old...LOL. Signing off. Leave comments.

In other news...

I took someone's advice and I marched my butt down to the school district's main office. (I was actually in the area after my first interview today, but that's another story all together.) I thought I would take a positive step in my job search process. I explained that yes, I just received my layoff letter on September 11. (I had been laid off since June, and I was a little confused over this too.) I thought that this might be a factor affecting my application and not getting called from schools, so I thought by going to Human Resources it would straighten things out. I was very polite, even though I felt like a dragon. My dragon head did not get reared, at least not today. I explained what location I worked, when I was excess-ed, and what I'm looking for. They said that it wouldn't affect my applications, but schools now have upwards of 200 qualified applicants that they are looking at for hiring. No wonder it's taking so long. So how do I make myself look different than 200 other people? I walked out of there with a list of schools and promptly began calling the schools I had applied for. One school told me that "they didn't know when they would begin their hiring process." What? It's September. Another school told me that "they had already filled the position, and had had it filled since June." Then why did you post it? I know this kind of things happen all the time in the job search process, but it frustrates me to no end. It's the sheer number of factors that add up to what seems to be a losing situation for the job seeker. I guess I just needed to rant, but I have to stay positive. I am a qualified individual with 5 years in the educational arena. I have a clear view of how schools operate and what my role in them should be. I should be able to communicate this to future employers, but not with this nonsense. Hiring processes are slow, I just didn't anticipate them being THIS slow. That's all.

Rambling random thoughts. WARNING: Incoherent post ahead

As I type this, I should be reading and typing responses to two more chapters of Mosaic of Thought. It's Saturday night. I have no motivation to do so, but I have to get going because I have no time tomorrow. Somehow I think I bit off a little more than I can chew when it comes to the whole community event planning, school, two jobs, getting along with roommates, trying to be a decent human being thing. It's just not working. I'm going insane. Why can I never find a decent balance between work and play? Why did I just use the word decent three times in one paragraph? Why do I think of a hundred other things to do when I'm supposed to be doing homework? Why do I ask so many questions? The next chapter I have to read is a chapter about questioning as a comprehension strategy. Maybe that will help me. Anyway, I'm off to make some tea and sit down to study again. Blah. I love my life. Really, I do. If I can only tweak it a little to play more and work less. Good thing we are going to the cabin next week. I will need a real weekend after this mess of a pretend weekend. Ha! Later.

Why I am posting at this un-GOD-ly hour in the morning

I went to bed at 8pm thanks to my illness and woke up at 3am with a splitting headache. Of course, the only thing I have for pain is Excedrin, which is loaded with caffeine and I can't sleep. So I will deal since I have to leave for work in close to two hours anyway. I'll nap this afternoon. That's just how my cookie crumbles.